What Happened to that Plan?

Sitting in church today, I asked myself, "Whatever happened to that dream of being a nurse-missionary in Africa?" And I couldn't figure out the answer.

That was the one career dream I kept coming back to in high school. Oh yes, I was as fickle then as I am now. I'd also wanted to be a podiatrist (why?!), a production assistant (um, ok), a journalist (been there done that not for me), a corporate mogul (that is another post for another day) and President of the United States (ok, I still daydream about that one).

But being a nurse in Africa resonated with me. So why did I forsake that dream? I think it was a perfect storm.

I was accepted to two nursing programs but turned them both down after spending a summer as a candy-striper at Summit Medical Center. So I went to a liberal arts school thinking I'd go pre-med.

My college adviser scared me to death when I said I was thinking pre-med. I remember leaving her office in tears. She even terrified my dad. And he isn't easily scared.

One of my closest friends at the time told me the medical field didn't seem like a fit for me.

Half-way through my freshwoman year at Mills--it's an all-girls college, so yes, we were called freshwomen--my grandmother had a series of strokes and it was during that crazy time that I declared my major. Perhaps I would have chosen differently if I hadn't had that emotional stress weighing on me. Who knows?!

I'm not saying I regret my choices because I don't. It's just I'd forgotten about wanting to be a nurse in Africa until this morning. And I couldn't remember why or when I let go of that aspiration. Ironically, my grandmother had also wanted to be a nurse-missionary in Africa. This is something I didn't know about her until we sat and chatted one afternoon after she had her strokes. She too couldn't think of why it didn't happen.

It's funny how life bends and shifts. Ironic how the future looks nothing like we imagined it would. Yet comforting to know the Big Guy has it all under control. It's all in His hands. And who knows? Maybe one day I'll pursue that Africa plan.